Wednesday was my surgery for the implant reconstruction. It was such a long day, once we got to the surgery center we found out there was a problem with the insurance coverage and our out of pocket was going to be $600 more than it should have been, because of a mistake that someone made and everyone was blaming someone else. I was very irritated. Not good right before surgery. Arnold was trying to help me relax by telling me in the end it doesn't matter. True, he is much better at dealing with these situations than I am.
Then they called me back to get me ready for surgery. Because I have had so much chemotherapy and because I have had lymph nodes removed on both sides, there are limits on where they can put the IV and they can't put it on the left side at all. Usually the anesthesiologist ends up getting it in the end. I still don't understand why I just can't have him do it to begin with, does every nurse have to try to poke me first before they understand that it's too difficult for them. I lost count of how many times I was poked but they were calling me a pincushion by the time I was being rolled back to surgery. I remember as I was being poked for I guess the 5Th time. I looked over at Arnold with tears in my eyes because I was so frustrated. Then finally the anesthesiologist came in and guess what he got it in! Why did they not send him in 1 1/2 hrs ago is beyond me.
O.K. I am supposed to learn something from everything that happens so I'm thinking what am I supposed to learn from this? What came to me was how Arnold looked when he saw what I was going through. He was in pain for me. At one point one of the nurses said WOW you have been through so much how do you deal with it? I said, as I was looking at Arnold, "he's my rock" and he said "but this rock crumbles sometimes". I am going to be honest I had a bad attitude Wednesday. I think that God allows things to happen in my life so that I will be grateful and thankful. God has truly blessed me with an amazing husband. I don't think anyone truly understands how difficult this is for him. When I looked over at him with tears in my eyes, I saw the pain and the fear in his eyes. He has watched me go through so much. The last few months he has been taking care of me, the office, the house, and dealing with the kids being gone, with me being down. I know that this is stressful for him. I love this man so much. Last night I couldn't sleep because, (don't tell him I told you) he was snoring so loud. I was getting frustrated and then I thought what if he wasn't here? or I wasn't here to hear it, and then it was the most beautiful sound to me. But it still kept waking me up so I asked him this morning for earplugs for Christmas!
I thank God today for blessing me with someone that makes me a better wife, mother, daughter, friend and most of all a better Christian woman. Arnold truly is my best friend in this world.
Then they called me back to get me ready for surgery. Because I have had so much chemotherapy and because I have had lymph nodes removed on both sides, there are limits on where they can put the IV and they can't put it on the left side at all. Usually the anesthesiologist ends up getting it in the end. I still don't understand why I just can't have him do it to begin with, does every nurse have to try to poke me first before they understand that it's too difficult for them. I lost count of how many times I was poked but they were calling me a pincushion by the time I was being rolled back to surgery. I remember as I was being poked for I guess the 5Th time. I looked over at Arnold with tears in my eyes because I was so frustrated. Then finally the anesthesiologist came in and guess what he got it in! Why did they not send him in 1 1/2 hrs ago is beyond me.
O.K. I am supposed to learn something from everything that happens so I'm thinking what am I supposed to learn from this? What came to me was how Arnold looked when he saw what I was going through. He was in pain for me. At one point one of the nurses said WOW you have been through so much how do you deal with it? I said, as I was looking at Arnold, "he's my rock" and he said "but this rock crumbles sometimes". I am going to be honest I had a bad attitude Wednesday. I think that God allows things to happen in my life so that I will be grateful and thankful. God has truly blessed me with an amazing husband. I don't think anyone truly understands how difficult this is for him. When I looked over at him with tears in my eyes, I saw the pain and the fear in his eyes. He has watched me go through so much. The last few months he has been taking care of me, the office, the house, and dealing with the kids being gone, with me being down. I know that this is stressful for him. I love this man so much. Last night I couldn't sleep because, (don't tell him I told you) he was snoring so loud. I was getting frustrated and then I thought what if he wasn't here? or I wasn't here to hear it, and then it was the most beautiful sound to me. But it still kept waking me up so I asked him this morning for earplugs for Christmas!
I thank God today for blessing me with someone that makes me a better wife, mother, daughter, friend and most of all a better Christian woman. Arnold truly is my best friend in this world.
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